I sat in the dark last night, thinking about how he is a teenager now. My heart did one of those heavy beats–do you know the kind I mean? The kind where your heart is just trucking along like normal, and then some thought or memory surfaces in your mind, and your heart drops…it beats, but it is a muted, heavy beat that you feel…something like a wave that ripples slowly through your body and soul, and time seems to slow for just a fraction of a second.
It happened when I realized I only had five years left with him.
Just five little years.
Thank you God, for every minute with this boy. (Yes, even the frustrating ones.)