I wonder if this is the right thing. 

I wonder if maybe we should just try a little longer. 

I love him.  I just really love him. 

Our air conditioning is broken.  It has been broken for four days now.  I am miserable.  Funny, even with a fur coat Charlie doesn’t seem to notice. 

I think about escaping this heat, just driving to get some ice cream or something with the kids, and then I remember that the car is at the shop.  The air conditioning in the car doesn’t work, either.  And the bearings need to be replaced, or it won’t pass inspection.  So we are stuck here.

When The Man told me how much all of this was going to cost to fix everything, I burst into tears.  

This is the worst summer ever.  I thought it was going to be awesome.

Last night I cried myself to sleep.  

This morning I woke up and my first thought was Charlie… 

I wonder how long it will be like that. 

I wonder how long it will take for him to be adopted.   

I wonder how long I will be sad like this.


6 thoughts on “Sad

  1. Soliloquy says:

    I hate it when my friends hurt. It makes me hurt too.

    You didn’t make the wrong choice or fail. Use this situation to teach your kids about differences and different needs. Charlie hasn’t done anything “wrong” and neither have they. We do our best, but sometimes we learn that we have to make changes in order to meet our own needs or those of someone we love. Sometimes that hurts, but we make sacrifices for those we love. Charlie has a home somewhere. Someone special who has what Charlie needs is waiting to give him a home. Without your sacrifice, Charlie can’t have what he needs most.

    And? God’s timing being sovereign, you’ll end up with the right family pet for you that you would never have found any other way. What if the right dog for you is somewhere waiting for its forever home?

    You’ve received repeated confirmation about the right thing to do. It’s sad, but everyone has the most (the best) to gain!

    Thinking of you friend, and asking God to use this difficulty as teachable time.

  2. Toni :O) says:

    Oh dearie…hang in there, I’m so sad for you guys…I know a bit how you are feeling…it’s hard in so many different places right now. With Borders Book Stores closing here in Michigan, that puts another 600 plus people out of work just in this state but close to 11,000 nation wide…that totally hurts my heart as we are HUGE book readers in this family and the thought of all of those people out of work…geez…awful. I’m feeling a major financial bite ourselves…it’s just painful right now some of the bills we’ve had and are upcoming and losing two jobs within 9 months is killing us, it’s so frightening and scary…plus, the value of my home I just learned two hours ago as we are refinancing, dropped almost $100,000 in the last five years (we’ve been here 10). Life stinks right now (and I apologize if my rambling has brought you down farther, just wanted to sympathize I guess) but I’m determined to make lemonade and keep the faith…He never gives us too much that we can’t handle…if we lived closer to one another, we’d make lemonade together! Don’t worry about Charlie, he’ll do great, some couple with no kids (that’s what I believe in my heart he needs, not sure that makes you feel any better) will provide him with another loving home, that much I feel certain about. Take care of what you can and God will do the rest, I firmly believe in that. God loves to test us and I guess it’s your turn to pass the test right now. Praying for you and hoping things get easier soon on you. Hugs friend and if you need to chat, you have my e-mail girl!

  3. Kelly Weist says:

    Hey friend, I was just surfing Facebook and saw someone reference your blog. I’m so sorry things are so tough for you right now. I wish I could help. Since I’m not sure what I could really do, I just wanted to say I still think and care about you all. I will pray for good times around the corner for you. Wishing you peaceful coolness in the near future my friend. xoxo

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