Shock and Awe

I’m certain she was going for shock and awe.  Because seriously, there is just no other reason for it. 

Imagine my darling little two year old girl.  So sweet.  So sweet in fact that I allowed her to walk about the Target instead of being strapped into the grocery cart like normal (which in hindsight would have prevented this entire affair).  Yes, imagine her… gazing into the mirror at the checkout at Target. 

Oh, you didn’t know there were mirrors at the checkout?  I didn’t either, until I looked down to see my darling little sweetie pie admiring herself in one of them…batting her eyelashes, talking to herself, posing.  And then.

And then, (I can hardly type this) she stuck out her tongue and ran it the entire length of said mirror. 

You know how you have those dreams where you’re trying desperately to run but your legs feel like they’re full of sand, and you can’t move?  Right.  That’s pretty much how I felt.  I might have screamed a little.  Because there were a lot of people looking at me right then…

What possesses a child to do such a thing?  I mean seriously?  Licking a mirror? 

I have to go now.  I have to go clean something.  Anything.

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Shock and Awe

12 thoughts on “Shock and Awe

  1. Thanks for the giggle today (I needed that). I’d be just as shocked too but coming from you, this is funny. If this helps, I bet not many know of this mirror since it’s at knee level so maybe it is not as dirty as I bet you’re thinking it is. Does that help?

  2. Brian licks mirrors too. And kisses them. I think it’s just a way of showing affection to the cute person in the mirror. They don’t realize it’s them maybe? He’s never licked on in public, but he definitely makes out with the floor length mirror in my bathroom once a week. Gross. Hopefully it’s a stage that will pass quickly. Enjoy cleaning!

  3. Aaaaack!

    I remember one of mine picking up a half-eaten cookie from the bottom of the shopping cart and started to eat it.

    And survived.

    Aaaaack. 😀

  4. Yup, Jack is a mirror-licker, too. It’s horrible and embarrassing. I agree, though, it’s just for shock value.

    I know where she’ll be sitting next time you go to Target!

  5. You would not be impressed at how hard I am laughing. This is just so, well, Ella ;).

    And you’ve got my address, google me and com’on over, I’ve got plenty of cleaning that needs done!

  6. Yes, it’s 1 a.m. and I’m reading posts … my guilty pleasure during “me” time that’s usually tucked away well after midnight.

    This post is hilarious – I could actually see you in my mind in slo mo. Crack me up! But ewwww. Ewwww again. Poor you. Poor Ella – she has no clue about John Q. Public’s hygiene standards. Well, she’s probably boosted her immune system for the rest of her life – a little dose of EVERY germ on the planet. Sorry for that. Again … ewwww.

    I’m sure a Target clerk had just sanitized that entire surface right before you arrived. Keep telling yourself that 😉

  7. I’ll trade you — your mirror licking two year old for my germaphobic twelve year old! He used to change his clothes every time he used the bathroom…because he had to pull his pants up BEFORE he washed his hands and that meant the pants were dirty!

  8. Toni :O) says:

    OMG…hilarious how that would have played out and gross at the same time. Parenting…sure is a rollercoaster ride isn’t it?! Hah! Have a great weekend! :O)

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