New Beginnings

You can hear it everywhere you go, mothers nearly giddy with delight over the idea of their children returning to school.  Perhaps it is the “I’m bored” comments from the children, or maybe it is the dirty fingerprints pasted all over the white door casings, or maybe it is the constant bickering over the orange lizard or the black frog (not that I would know anything about that) or any toy for that matter.  Somehow, the lack of a routine or schedule that was so welcomed at the beginning of the summer has worn us thin, and we crave the orderliness that the school day brings to our lives once more. 

As a child, I couldn’t wait for the start of school…new school supplies, new clothes, new friends…it was all about a fresh start, a new beginning.  But as a mother, I am much less excited for this new beginning.  My children are excited, and yes, I guess I am looking forward to them meeting their new teachers, sort of.  I had fun shopping for school supplies, and new shoes and outfits for school.  

But there was an ache in my heart that was nearly palpable at times, when I would realize that the dreamy days of toddlerhood are quickly coming to an end.  And always in the back of my mind is the undeniable fact that they are one year older. 

They are one year closer to not wanting to hold my hand, and one year closer to the end of bedtime snuggles. 

Pretty soon, they won’t enjoy blowing bubbles anymore, they won’t want to run through the sprinkler, or make paper dolls, or play with legos. 

I’ll feel the sting of their growing independence when they ask me to let them go by themselves one day.  And I’ll watch as they cross the street to the bus stop by themselves.  And I will wonder when exactly it was that they got so BIG.

I will have a lot of time this school year to spend with just my baby girl.  And I try to remind myself how nice and quiet the house will be with just Ella and me in the mornings.  But I think that the quiet is only going to remind me of what is missing around the house…

Things just don’t feel right when they’re not around.  I guess I’ve become accustomed to the noise–both the laughter and the squabbling–and the never-ending battle of the crumbs, and those dirty fingerprints.  And I just don’t want the carefree feeling of summer to end. 

So for the last week of summer, we’re going to run through the sprinkler, and eat popsicles, and blow bubbles.  And we’ll have picnics and play in the dirt and stay out late riding bikes with our friends.  We’ll take long walks and go to the pool with Daddy and make s’mores.  We’ll paint our toenails (well, Kate and I anyway!), and drink lemonaide and watch Princess Diaries.  And I’m going to soak in this last week of summer, before the madness of school and sports and religion and scouting begins again. 

Before they are one year closer to spreading their wings, and flying away.  Oh, this nest is going to feel so empty.

New Beginnings

8 thoughts on “New Beginnings

  1. You’re making me teary…I still have 2 more years until all 3 kids are in school/full day…will it really go by that quickly? Sniff…

    great pic!

  2. Have fun in the sprinklers and blowing bubbles! I loved this beautiful post! And you read my mind…I am in the middle of writing a post about this very thing…the fact that I was so ready to have my kiddos go back to school, and now that it’s tomorrow…I’m having a hard time believing that my “baby” is going into second grade. It’s not going to be as easy as I thought to drop them off for the day.

  3. Marcy says:

    Hello friend.

    I hear you…and this is from the mommy that has had a back to school countdown since June 18th 😉

    Adding going back to work to the mix isn’t making things any easier for me either 😦

    Enjoy that time with Ella. And be happy that you aren’t shipping a child off to MIDDLE SCHOOL!

    Have a wonderful last week fo summer.

  4. That photo shows how much you enjoy your children, and how much they enjoy you. Beautiful post and the picture melts my heart. Perfect plan for the last week of summer – soak it up!

  5. I came to check you out after you commented on my blog, and now I am in tears. Sigh. They do grow up so quickly, don’t they?

    I’ve spent way too much time delving into your world reading your posts. You are such a gifted writer. LOVE the red hair on your little ones, but then again, I’m partial.

    I’ll be back!

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