Bedtime
September 21, 2009
We set up the toddler bed this weekend. I’m not sure how I feel about that. The Man kind of took the ball and ran with the idea, and I pretty much stood there, like in one of those dreams where you’re trying to run, but your legs won’t move. Knowing it is the right thing, but knowing what it means…the baby is gone. The last baby is gone.
(Of course the last time I thought that, I gave all the baby stuff away and promptly became pregnant.)
But really this time, the last baby is gone. Really.
So we have a toddler bed now. And bedtime with Ella? It’s always interesting.
We read books together.
We snuggle.
We sing.
We kiss. And kiss. And kiss.
And then I say good night, and close the door.
After a couple minutes, the door handle rattles…she tries to open her door. It’s late. I’m exhausted.
So now, admittedly a teensy bit annoyed at her blatant disregard for the stay-in-your-bed rule, I open her door intent on plopping her right back in bed.
I see her dolls–all of them nude and lined up on the chair.
Her socks lay in a crumpled mess on the floor. As does her diaper. And her jammies.
And then I see her, behind the door. Completely naked.
“Ello” she says, and then she bursts through the door and streaks down the hall, laughing and screeching and smacking her buns.
Our laughter does nothing to discourage her, I’m sure.
I pick her up, and scold her gently for getting out of her bed. I put on her ladybug jammies and the Hokie jersey that she simply insists on wearing to bed tonight (I can’t say I blame her–did you see that come-from-behind win against Nebraska?). And some striped socks. She’s two. She has some very definite opinions on fashion. And they’re questionable, imho. But whatever, it looks cute on two.
She settles into my shoulder, and we stand there, rocking back and forth. Moments like these are fleeting, I know.
“It’s time to sleep now, Ella” I tell her.
“Oh” she says.
“No more getting out of bed.”
“Oh.”
“Ella, you’re my baby.”
“Oh.”
“You’ll always be my baby.”
“Oh.”
“I love you, Ella.”
“Oh.”
Good night baby girl.
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Hokie Unity
April 16, 2009
Two years ago today, an unimaginable tragedy struck our campus. It was an act perpetrated by a coward, who sought to steal something from us. What he did, in fact, was show the world that we will never break. We will prevail. And we will do so with the support of the world.
The following is a post from TechSideline.com. I have kept it for the last two years because it spoke volumes to me about people, and how they pull together in the face of the unspeakable. Even those that purport to hate us in ordinary times. Hokies felt connected to each other, but we also felt connected to the entire state of Virginia (even those nasty wahoos), the schools in the ACC, the United States of America, the world.
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There was a huge outpouring of support on the TSL message boards and email this week from fans and alumni of other universities. A lot of it came from schools who have recently played Virginia Tech in football or will soon play them in football … or both. Quite a few LSU fans showed up to express condolences, as did Auburn fans (Sugar Bowl 2004), Clemson fans, and even some Alabama fans (from the 1998 Music City Bowl clash — TSL’s GM, Will Stewart, was interviewed by ESPN radio in Mobile, Alabama, by a show host who normally concentrates on Alabama Crimson Tide sports and who referenced that 1998 Music City Bowl as the reason he respected VT.) Colorado and Colorado State fans stopped by, because the VT tragedy resonated with them, due to the Columbine shootings years ago. They consoled us and warned us about the media coverage. (They were right about that.) Texas A&M fans came by and emailed in large numbers, because Virginia Tech and Texas A&M “get” each other, more so than perhaps any two other schools in the country. There is a special bond and respect between A&M and VT, even though the two schools haven’t played football in four years and aren’t scheduled to do so again. The bond arises from mutual respect earned during the 2002 and 2003 A&M/VT clashes. And of course, there are the Cavaliers from the University of Virginia. The support shown in Charlottesville and on TheSabre.com has been remarkable. So we present to you two posts made on our boards this week by Virginia fans. These were among the better, more heartfelt posts we saw. They weren’t the only ones, of course, and they may not even be “the best.” But we liked them, and we grabbed them when we saw them. We close out a difficult week with heartfelt thoughts from the other side.
I can’t tell you how proud I was to see you chanting “Let’s Go Hokies” during the convocation today. I am a fervent Hoo and like all of us over the country, my heart couldn’t be heavier. Many of my great friends went to VT and I have even filled up some seats at Scott Stadium with Hokie friends over Hoo coworkers because they were, well, my friends. In fact, the last time you came to Charlottesville, I was in the bar with them by halftime. It was a chance to not care about anything in the world but fun and great people. Its funny to hear the reporters ask dumb questions like “Will the Hokies recover?” Obviously they don’t know about Virginia Tech. You can take the large mega state colleges, the pristine ivy leagues, and the elite private schools; but even the Hoos know that you will be hard pressed to find fans any prouder of their school than those draped in orange and maroon. VT posters keep thanking us on thesabre.com for the support, but we should be thanking you for allowing us to share in your rebuilding. I see students handling questions from merciless reporters with tremendous poise. I tear up just seeing the images on television. Today, I wore my orange sweater, and kept my office door shut because I didn’t want people seeing my eyes well up every time I clicked online for coverage. And when I watched your service today, one fact was more impressive than the pedigree of the speakers, the words in the messages, or the masses of media clamoring in from the world: You started the service standing up for your leader and you ended the service shouting for your school. There goes that Hokie pride that never, ever waivers. Ever. “We will prevail, we will prevail, we will prevail.” Damn right you will.
Subject: The Hokie Culture One thing has become crystal clear in this tragedy: their collective culture has made them uniquely prepared to emerge from this as strong as ever. And thank God. In “peacetime”, the Tech unity always confused me. I’ve never met a Tech grad who wasn’t demonstrative about his or her alma mater. My brother-in-law — at 40 — drives the 5 hours or so for every home football game, flies to every bowl game, and travels to many road games. At a colleague’s house (female, also 40ish), it seemed like every household item was maroon or orange. Blankets, rugs, cups, etc., etc. Every Tech grad in my neighborhood always has a flag out. School spirit is WAY greater than at most other schools. Contrast: I was a rabid Wahoo during my undergrad and grad years. Never missed a football, basketball, lax or soccer game. I’m enormously proud of my degrees. But I have… let’s see… a UVa sweatshirt, a UVa soccer T, and a UVA lax T. Now, I keep close track of the soccer and lax teams, but little else. People can know me for years without the subject coming up. Obviously there are many rabid Wahoo fans here on this board, but out of my friends, I’d say I’m fairly typical. And the same goes for my non-UVa friends. In the Post today, they talked about the “be-true-to-your-school chauvinism and clubby rituals” and the “ridiculous sense of unity”. Why the big difference? What is it about the Tech experience that forges this identity? It can’t be the campus– it’s a very nice campus, but there are plenty of beautiful campuses that don’t spawn that sense of identity. It can’t be the population or demographics — whatever differences between Tech and UVa populations there once were have largely vanished in the last few decades. Is it the geographic remoteness? Are other remote schools similar? What is handed down from student to student that accounts for this culture? Let me be clear — I’ve never viewed it as a great positive. But now, when an almost unimaginable tragedy has hit the community, I’m hugely, hugely grateful that those kids have that sense of unity to help pull them through. Hokies — you’re much bigger than this tragedy. Continue to be strong, and know that everyone in Virginia is pulling for you. |
Stand proud Hokies…we have prevailed.
A Good Day
December 6, 2008
1. Virginia Tech wins back-to-back ACC championships. It was a “rebuilding” year. I can’t say how proud I am of my Hokies! And to all you fans who didn’t turn the t.v. off when we were losing a game this season…we did it!!!
2. Lunch with my good friend, Jenny, for her birthday. We had a wonderful lunch…butternut squash ravioli in a wonderful white sauce for me…buffalo shrimp wrap for her. YUM!
3. Cars in my dining room.
4. A four — F. O. U. R. — four hour nap for Ella. Did I mention she slept for FOUR hours? We actually watched the entire ACC Championship game without interruption. Except for bathroom breaks. And, like, to get a beer or something important like that. Woohoo!
Yep. It’s been a good day.
Delusional
October 7, 2008
Delusional. I think that is an appropriate word for my state of mind at the time I planned this trip. What ever possessed me, I’ll never know. Other people go to football games with their kids, right? And they have fun, right? I figured we could do it, too. But then, I forgot that we’re not really so much like all the other families. We have applied for membership in THAT family tree society.
We (really me, because much as he’d like to, the man just never really gets around to the planning part of things. So if you want to do something, you pretty much have to plan the entire thing out for yourself. But I digress…) planned this trip to Virginia Tech for homecoming weekend. We had tickets to the game. We had a cabin for the weekend about 30 minutes away, and my parents had their own cabin just a short walk away. And the weather was going to be absolutely beautiful. And it was filet Friday. (as in filet mignon. Prepared by my parents. All I had to do was eat.)
The view from our cabin was nothing short of beautiful:
The weather was perfect. PERFECT.
And that’s pretty much where the fun stopped.
Ella was sick. Ella was fussy. Ella was unmanageable. Ella is always headstrong and I just really don’t know where she gets that. At all.
We got to the tailgate. I didn’t plan on taking her to the game, because I’m not that stupid. But I did plan on having a beer and eating some chili and enjoying the beautiful weather and the buildings made of Hokie stone, and watching all of the fans dressed in orange & maroon and smelling the bbq, and spending time like we used to, years ago, and just.plain.being.there.
I was there long enough to put tattoos on the children, take a few snapshots, and realize that Ella wanted no part of anything fun. She walked around fussing, and when you’d try to pick her up, she’d do that back-arching thing they do that is really frustrating. She was just miserable.
I left and had a pity party for one on the way back to the cabin. I think a little piece of me might have died. Okay, that might be a little dramatic, but I was seriously disappointed. I spent the rest of the afternoon with a much happier, well-rested little girl, while the others enjoyed, much as they could, the tailgate and the game.
Look at this face…
You can’t stay mad for long when you look at that face.
We’ll try again next year. Maybe.
Tidbits from ‘Round Here
September 9, 2008
Nothing very exciting or interesting going on ’round here, but I do have a few little odds and ends from Kristen-town.
1. I found Barbie’s torso and arms. Still no ant heads, though.
2. It was my brilliant (did I ever mention that I’m brilliant?) idea to buy 200 daffodil bulbs for autumn planting. I was so excited to get started. So excited. I got started. Um…it’s going to take a LONG time to plant 200 daffodil bulbs. I started out measuring the depth of each hole, making sure I was at the perfect depth, pulling out all kinds of rocks and such from the soil. By the time I had gotten about 50 done, ”good enough” was my motto. I had broken my spade in half, the gardening claw I was using was bent, and I resigned myself to the fact that some of the bulbs just might not be planted to the suggested depth. And we’ll just see if they come up in the spring. And hey, I’ll just throw a couple inches of mulch on top and there you go, they’ll be deep enough. I’ve only got another 135 bulbs to go…
3. Pretty darling first-day-of-school pictures from last week…
4. Saw a couple of turtles in the back yard, ahem, ‘wrestling,’ ahem, this weekend. It’s a slow process folks. There wasn’t a whole lotta movement. In fact, the female was completely inside her shell, and the male kept trying to bite her. Now that I think about it, it was kind of disturbing. Yep, there’s nothing like a little turtle sex to liven things up.
5. Let the sickness begin. We were in school for THREE DAYS before the first sick day in our house. The virus is just picking us off, one by one. The only one left untouched by this one is the man, as usual.
6. The Hokies pulled off a victory this weekend. The game wasn’t being televised, so we paid $5 to be able to view the game online. We watched the game on a teeny tiny screen, all of us but the baby, huddled around the coffee table. Now this is dedication, people.
7. I bought an athletic supporter and cup for baseball for my 6 year old this weekend. That was a little wierd. Anyhoo, when he got home from school, he really wanted to put it on. He came struttin’ out of his room with nothing but an undershirt and his cup + supporter on. He wanted to make sure he had it on correctly. When he turned around to go back in his room, I couldn’t help but smile.
8. Kate started jazz this weekend. There isn’t a whole lot that is cuter than watching a bunch of 7 year old girls shakin’ it to the music.
9. I was doing laundry today, moving clothes from the dryer to the “laundry chair” as I like to call it, and when I came back to the laundry room, found Ella here:
Now that is pretty cute, too, eh?
And that’s the scoop around here. Have a warm, fuzzy, lint-free day!
Remembering
April 16, 2008
April 16th, 2007 is a day that those of us lucky enough to call ourselves Hokies will never forget.
In the wake of the tragedy, I felt angry. Angry that people who have never before really contemplated Virginia Tech will forever have this incident as the prominent reference embedded in their minds. I worried that this is what they will think of when they hear the words ”Virginia Tech.” But while I felt so angry that one twisted individual could inflict such pain, I was blown away by the kindness of a community, a state, a conference, a nation, a world. And through reading hundreds and hundreds of comments from people around the globe, I realized that what will be remembered is the strength of our family.
And I have never felt more proud to be a Hokie.
In the words of poet Nikki Giovanni
“We are the Hokies. We will prevail, we will prevail, we will prevail. We are Virginia Tech.”
Remembering the 32 who went before us one year ago this day.
I am a thirty-something wife and stay-at-home mom of 4 little children. My days are filled with playdates, storybooks and homework; naptime, diapers and laundry; boo-boos, boogers, wet kisses and warm hugs. There are crumbs on the floor, and sticky fingerprints on the windows. It is a time in my life that is very challenging, but there are moments that are like epiphanies in which I see very clearly just how beautiful my life is.
